Reader matter:

Me: 46 years of age, African-American male, specialist job, resident, good looking, 20-year-old boy. We date outside my race. I’m in excellent form.

It appears everything females desire a loyal union, they don’t really should commit to me personally. I do have a “list” of attractive characteristics — appealing, in a position to eliminate the woman finances, a social or nondrinker and someone who is actually ready and able to travel and do things.

Exactly why is it difficult for females to dedicate when I provide external signs and symptoms of wanting to take a committed relationship?

-Mark (California)

Dr. Wendy Walsh’s Answer:

Dear Mark,

Yes, so many women can be behaving like males (or the way they THINK males behave) and tend to be steering clear of devotion. That being said, i am going to let you know there are still far more women who want a secure connection than perhaps not.

I am wondering exactly why you may seem getting interested in women who prevent a great connect. Could this end up being your choice in objectives?

My advice should be to speak with ladies that you may well not initially be drawn to and view any time you warm-up in their mind. Often our very own inability locate a secure commitment relates to the worries of abandonment.

This basically means, we decided to go with lovers who cannot get near to shield you from becoming “dangerously” close and exposure abandonment.

Take to dating the sort of person you’ve never, actually dated before. Go slow. And watch your feelings along the way.

Do you really be quickly jealous, should manage her time or would you like to close the offer too quickly? The secret to success would be to consist of yourself and quell your own concerns.

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